One More Day

Until I get to go to that place affectionately known as home. Yes! The 24 hour countdown has begun. Never mind the fact that I have two finals within these 24 hours. Nothing, and I do mean nothing, is going to stop me from being super excited. I have waited all week for this day to come. All week I have been studying and generally torturing myself with academia. But in 24 hours, it will all be over. My parents will be coming down and I will be heading back to Fort Wayne.

It is the first Christmas break that I will have no homework whatsoever. Isn't that a novel concept? So instead of slaving over books I will be relaxing and enjoying life. Oh. And Christmas is only 8 days away! Now, I don't have all of my Christmas shopping, but that's mere details, right? Right.

I can't wait to go home and give my cat a huge hug. And to see my brother and sister who I know have missed me the past three weeks that I have been gone. Honestly I have been ready to go home since I got back from Thanksgiving. However, I have persevered and the glorious day is drawing near! Home home home! Just a little bit more packing to do, some studying, and of course, sleep and then I will be well on my way. :)

Spaghetti is the essence of life

No, this post is not going to be about spaghetti. Not entirely, anyway. I did make spaghetti for dinner tonight. It's the first time since I have moved out of my house that I have had it. Okay, at least I think so. I can vouch for this in regards to the dining courts. For some odd reason we never eat spaghetti. They have served every other type of pasta, but no spaghetti. Oh how I had missed the twirly goodness of spaghetti! It really does warm the heart after a long day...

Anyways, it is coming to the end of December meaning that another year has come and gone. Around this time of year I usually go through and re-read what I have wrote in my journal. Most of the time I laugh at memories that I had seemingly forgotten. Sometimes it hurts to read things that have happened in the past. The main reason that I read through my journal is to see how much I have grown over the past year. Sometimes it is easy to think that I am not growing at all. That's why I keep a journal, to remind myself of where I have been and how I have changed. In light of this, I have found many funny quotes in my journal. Taken out of context they sound odd. Hopefully they will make you laugh and make your day better! And if you really want some more explanation or the context of these statements, just comment away :)

"Sacrifice is always stark in the dark."

"Mightly convenient seeing as my mom has my sunscreen"

"I had a pina colada-this time it was really good."

"I love the iced tea and the possibility of alcohol...ha ha!"

"I had no idea what I was doing so I "faked" it for a picture."

"I think I can be nominated for epic failure in keeping a journal"

"I am not going to change who I am--that is crazy"

"But in her fragile state, I am dubious"

"But oh. The chance of something more is a double edge sword to my heart"

"Friendships are so tricky. Hard to make, hard to keep, wonderful to have"

Christmas

This is the first time that I have really had a hard time to get into the Christmas spirit. I blame it on the fact that all of the things that signal that Christmas are coming are not present. I put up the Christmas tree over break and the Christmas lights outside, but that's about it. I wasn't home when my mom baked Christmas cookies, didn't go to Holidays with Charisma, and I have certainly not seen the gifts (or lack thereof) under the tree. Sigh. Such is life.

However, I do have a Christmas tree in my room and the lights are sparkling. That helps me to stay motivated when I am studying for my finals. Yes, the finals are coming right around the corner. I have finals next week on Tuesday, Thursday, and Friday. Then I will be home, sweet home :)

Love

It is interesting how this four letter word stirs up emotions and memories in people. Love. It's a word that doesn't have just one definition. Love means different things to different people. And in a society where love is thrown around with words like french fires and cars, I would venture to say that it has has been cheapened.

This is the one area where I will freely admit that I am too cynical for my own good. I always consider this to be somewhat of an oddity. My parents are still together and I have grown up with many positive role models. I myself, have even been in love. So why the cynicism? Indeed, I would like to know why. At my core, I am a hopeless romantic. Everytime I hear Love Story by Taylor Swift I get all happy bubbly inside. I don't cry  very much, but pop in a chick flick and I will tear up.

I would like to believe that everyone has a special someone and that it all ends in bliss. Really, I would. But I have a hard time convincing myself of that. The soulmate theory has never appealed to me. Maybe it's because I am afraid I will miss out. What then? Do I blame myself or just ditch the theory?

One thing that I know to be true is God's love for me. I can't even begin to comprehend how much He loves me and He has great things in store for me! If God loves me this much, then why do I worry? Why do I get caught up in the silly things? God is in control, not me. It's a simple truth that I have to remind myself of time and again.

So with that in mind, I press forward. My love questions remain, at this time, unresolved. I might continue to be skeptical, who knows? But as a wise friend told me, "one day that boy is going to come and sweep you off your feet and you won't remember all the pain". Ah, so true. Until that day...

Have a great day today! It's getting closer to Christmas! :)